Empty Devotion
by Envious Sloth
Summary: AU Drabble and Spoilers for Ch 2 She must live. She had to. And she will keep their wishes until the end.


She had watched them go. She had watched them look at her with shock and utter despair at the revelation of her schemes — of who she really is. They did not blame her whatsoever, not even when they were facing their demise, backs turned against her as they were pulled away for their executions. She watched as twelve pairs of eyes stared at her until their very last moments, desperate to live but understanding what their fate has come to. Their eyes plead with her to stay alive for their sake: to escape and save the world. She wished she had turned away, but this is what she had to face. She had to remember them for giving up their lives to her. Even when they had desperately wanted to live, they had given up for her, and she must ensure them that their actions will never be for naught. She must ensure that she will live and protect the world, as she had promised. She must live for them.

Soon the faces that she had come to love began to disappear. Wishes crushed one by one until it was only her, staring from beyond. Their lingering wish. That is what she had become. She gritted her teeth and shut her eyes tight, pulling herself away from the scene. She knew she had to do it. It was many over a few. She could not make any other choice.

Then, the outer world awaited her. She let the enemy guide her to the way out for her graduation ceremony, leaving the hellish place behind. It was time. She had to go and fix the world again. To protect her beloved citizens again and restore the world she has come to know back to the way it was before. That is what she must do, as she faced the opening doors and breathe in the new, open air.

However, nothing could have prepared her for what she had seen when she took her first step into the murky, cold air outside. As soon as she had turned away from eyes desperate to live, she found herself looking at them again. Eyes in their very last moment gaze up at her, in fear and hopelessness, veiled under the disgusting red that had twisted her stomach. Hands outstretched towards her, begging for help. They were begging in their final anguished looks. Piles and piles of them, all looking at her, wanting her — needing her.

But she did not hear them. She couldn't have. She was not there when they needed her the most. She could not be there to protect them. They suffered without her being able to do anything. She was blind to their pain, as they had been tormented, twisted, with tears streaming profusely from their eyes.

She can imagine them aching and wreathing. She can imagine them praying that their trusted leader will save them, get them out of this hellhole, with hopeful, glimmering smiles. She can imagine how their hopes were shattered horridly before their eyes when they realized that she was not coming — that their leader was nowhere to be found and they were going to be left to die. The leader that they have cherished and praised had left them behind.

To die.

And all because she was not there.

Her hands clenched. She dropped to her knees, eyes watering from the sight. She could not hold it in any longer. The deaths she had just seen, the deaths she had seen before her, the death she had caused. It had all overwhelmed her, grief striking her heart and crushing it until there was nothing left.

And that is when she had realized what she had done. The worst crime that she had committed thus far: she had just killed the remainder of her precious citizens. The very citizens that she was trying to protect. She had easily let them go. Easily had them be killed right before her eyes, and she did nothing but watch.

That was it. She had nothing to live for. There was nothing else for her. She had broken that promise, that wish she had made with her citizens — her _final_ citizens. No longer was she needed. All the things that she had done were all for naught. And it was her fault. It was her fault that they had died, and she let it happen.

She cried loudly, screaming before the scene and all that was lost. She felt limbs grow weak, eyes hurting from the salt of her tears, and her throat burning from her screams. She cried for every single individual that was lost because of her. She had failed her duty and she could not make it up to them.

But in the midst of those screams, she realized that she did not deserve to cry. No, she needed some way to atone for this. Some way that she can make it up to them. For the sake of her citizens. After all, it was them that mattered the most here; not her. Especially not her.

She stood up slowly, alone in this new silent, desolate world. She stared onward, beyond the faces that looked up to her. In her thoughts she made a vow to those eyes that stare at her to not worry; for she will create the greatest punishment for herself as their leader. After all, it is what she must do for her selfless devotion to them.


End file.
